


Left Behind

by madmeridian



Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, Light Angst, M/M, Soulmates, first words your soulmate says to you are written on your wrist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:42:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27598403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madmeridian/pseuds/madmeridian
Summary: Near finds out who his soulmate is at a relatively young age, but it’s less than ideal.It’d probably be okay, if Mello would actually talk to him about it.
Relationships: Linda/Matt | Mail Jeevas, Mello | Mihael Keehl/Near | Nate River
Comments: 10
Kudos: 65





	Left Behind

**Author's Note:**

> From an anon on tumblr: “Do you think you could write a Meronia soulmate AU? Maybe something where either first or last words are written on your wrist??” 
> 
> I chose to do first words and I’m sorry if this wasn’t what you were thinking... I love soulmate AUs but I had a lot of trouble writing this and I don’t know why 😓

_Get out of my way, idiot!_

They weren’t kind words. Still Near hadn’t been surprised by them, etched on his wrist in scrawling black writing. His life hadn’t been particularly kind and having those words there was just another reminder of that. 

He hadn’t really noticed them until he’d arrived at Wammy’s. They had just been another miserable part of his life. But then Linda, his first friend, asked him with excitement what his words were. She shows him hers first, the handwriting on her wrist barely legible. 

_Hey Linda, wait, I think you dropped your notebook!_

Near shows her his own words shyly, unsure of what she would think of the unkind words. They’d only been six or seven at the time.

“They must be in a hurry when you meet them,” Linda reassures. “I’m sure that they’re actually really nice!” 

“Probably,” Near mumbles, pulling his sleeve back over his wrist. “I don’t care much.” 

“You should!” Linda said excitedly. “This is the person that’s made for you! Your soulmate!” 

“I suppose.” Near tugs nervously at his sleeve and listened as Linda described her perfect soulmate.

And three months later, he meets soulmate. 

A nine year year old boy, older than most that come to Wammy’s, is introduced. He’s blond and he looks sad, as do most new arrivals. He calls himself Mihael still, but Near knows that soon he’ll be calling himself by his chosen moniker. 

The mentors already all call him Mello. Most catch on quickly, since everyone else addresses them as their nickname. 

He befriends Matt, who usually doesn’t socialize with others. But the two of them were rooming and seemed to have attached well. Near doesn’t say hello to the new arrival, but he’s sure the other orphans have already told Mello that he’s not much of a social butterfly. 

Near is shocked to learn that Mello’s marks in classes are just barely behind him. Previously, it had been Matt’s, but… his weren’t really that close. 

He is also shocked to see Mello glaring at him after finding out their grades. Near doesn’t stare back, ducking his head and avoiding looking back at him. Linda whispers to him that Mello had proclaimed them rivals, which made no sense to Near. They didn’t even know each other. 

Mello never speaks to him though, only dark, envious stares whenever marks come out. It unsettles Near. And the staff at the orphanage too. They begin to hang around whenever the two of them are near each other, as if one of them were going to go feral and kill the other. 

With Mello, Near wouldn’t doubt it. He’d become a terror to some of the other kids there. 

Near is walking through the halls, his toy robot clutched tight in his arms. The staff forces him to spend time in the common room, but he was able to escape their hawk-like gazes for once. His room is far more comfortable to play in. 

A group of boys comes thundering down the stairs as Near’s about to take the first step up. One of them knocks him on the floor. 

“Get out of the way, idiot!”

Near almost wants to cry because he knows that voice and he knows those words all too well. 

He watches his soulmate run past with his group of friends.

Mello. 

But Near does not cry and he gets up calmly. He goes to his room and plays and does his homework. 

Linda has to bring him dinner because he refuses to leave his room. She tries to coax him out, to no avail. 

It takes him a few days to process this new information. Mello was his soulmate, which meant that his soulmate didn’t like him at all. Enough so to call them rivals, at least. Typical. 

He doesn’t look at Mello at all when he finally emerges from his room. Obviously, Mello doesn’t notice the difference. He doesn’t even notice that they’re soulmates. Of course, Near hadn’t said anything to him, so he wouldn’t. 

After two weeks of nagging, he finally breaks down and tells Linda. He expects her to shout about it and demand he go talk to Mello, but she doesn’t. She gives him an oddly soft look and tells him that she’s here for him if he wants to talk. 

A month passes and Near thinks that perhaps he’s safe and Mello will never know that they’re soulmates. He can hide and save himself from any pain. It’s selfish, but Near thinks that realistically, considering the future Wammy’s has laid out for them, it’s the best. 

It doesn’t work out that well. 

It’s a normal school day. Linda sits next to Near, talking animatedly and ignoring her homework assignment and making the teacher shoot looks at them. She doesn’t say anything though, since they’re both stellar students. 

The bell rings and Linda hops up, still chattering away in Near’s ear about ideas she has for her art. She starts to walk away from her desk with Near in tow, and Near’s about to tell her she’s dropped her notebook on the floor and is leaving it behind, when-

“Hey Linda, wait, I think you dropped your notebook,” Matt says loudly, waving it in the air. Linda gasps and turns around, her eyes widened almost comically. Then, she turns red and smiles. 

“Here you go.” Matt hands her the notebook, oblivious to what’s happened. Linda looks like she’s practically vibrating with energy and Near fears that she’s about to explode. 

She finally just flings herself at Matt, who stumbles back in surprise. Near notices that Mello is there too, watching with complete confusion. 

“You’re my soulmate,” she squeals. She releases him from her iron grip hug and pulls back her sleeve, proudly showing off the words. Matt, with a shocked look on his face, pulls his back too. 

_You’re my soulmate_ is written in Linda’s neat handwriting on his wrist. Linda squeals in delight and drags Matt off. 

Leaving Mello and Near alone in the classroom. 

Mello glares at him, daring him to say something. Near turns to leave, but Mello grabs his shoulder. 

“Don’t think this means we can get along now,” Mello hisses. Near almost freaks out before realizing he’s talking about Matt and Linda. 

“I wasn’t going to assume that,” Near says evenly. Mello’s eyes narrow in anger and something similar to shock. Near realizes he’s messed up. Mello snatches Near’s wrist and wrenches his sleeve out of the way, reading his own words. 

Near can see past Mello’s sleeve, on his wrist, the words that Near had just said, written in his own writing. 

Mello pushes him out of way and says nothing. 

Neither of them speak of it for the next few years. Mello still glares at him, but he never pushes him around or insults him. It’s almost worse, being in some sort of limbo with each other.

L’s death changes everything. Roger pulls them both into his office and told them about it. He prays that Mello would agree to work with him. 

No such luck. He says goodbye only to Matt and goes off on his own. 

Linda tries to comfort Near, but he pushes her away. He has to take on L’s name alone and she had Matt to worry about. He’s becoming insistent on finding Mello and she’s probably the only person who could hold Matt back. 

So, Near goes off on his own. Trying to get back on track without previous data was difficult, but his team was managing. He’d established contact with the false L, Kira, Light Yagami. It was all going well. 

Until he hears of Takimura’s kidnapping. Then Sayu Yagami. 

Mello finally decides to show up.

Near is certain that Mello will use the notebook as soon as he gets it. He’s certain that Mello is still playing as if they were rivals. It;s a nuisance and Near just wants them to work together and get this done. 

If only. 

Then, he receives an anonymous message. Rester hands him the phone nervously. 

_Get rid of your team except for Anthony Rester, Stephen Gevanni, and Halle Lidner._

Near has a feeling that this is a threat, so he does as it says. The three SPK members sit around nervously as the Task Force conducts their raid on Mello’s hideout. The building explodes with Mello in it. He can hear how enraged Light Yagami is by all of this. 

The others think that Mello is dead, but Near knows for a fact that he is not. Mello isn’t stupid. He would have had a back up plan. 

But there is nothing indicating he is alive for a while. Near continues to operate, continues to gather information on Light Yagami. He focuses on work and the SPK often has to force him to do anything else. 

He’s only lucky that they do not know of the true nature of his and Mello’s relationship. 

Near is sure that they’re beginning to suspect something is abnormal between the two of them, but that is forgotten when Mello arrives at their headquarters, very much alive, and waving his gun about. 

Mello is his usual self, getting insulted by whatever comes out of Near’s mouth. Still, Near had an odd feeling that Mello wasn’t quite being honest. He doesn’t dwell on it and keeps working for the rest of the day. He only mulls over it as he gets ready for bed.

Someone taps on his window that night as he tries to sleep. No one should know what this building truly is, nor who resides in it. He rolls over and nearly falls out of bed when he sees Mello peering in. His room was several stories up and he wasn’t sure how anyone could possibly make it up that far. 

He tentatively unlocks the window and Mello climbs through the window. Near looks down and wonders how Mello had gotten up here. 

“Didn’t want to go through all your fucking security at the doors,” Mello says, peeling off his leather gloves and jacket.

“And somehow you thought that was easier.” Near closes the window. It’s cold out and Near is only wearing his pajama shirt and boxers. The large shirt covers him enough, but he still feels bare. He slips back under his covers, gazing at Mello. In his room. At night. 

“I don’t know about easy, but it was more fun.” Mello sits down at the edge of his bed, crossing his arms. “We need to talk.” 

“You could’ve said so earlier.” 

“Not in front of your agents.”

“Very well,” Near says. “What is it?” 

Irritatingly, Mello says nothing for a minute. He’s the one who came here, in the middle of the night, to talk. Yet, Near is greeted with silence. 

Then a heavy, gloomy sigh. Near isn’t entertained by it. 

“I know you’re probably upset with me for leaving,” Mello starts slowly. “And I regret it. A lot. I’ve had a lot of time to think about it.” Mello seems like he’s being genuine, but Near lays back and glares. 

“Then why did you point a gun at me today?” 

“I think we should still work separately for now,” Mello says, picking at the edge of the bedsheets. “We can gather information better that way.”

Near pulls his blanket up to his face, unintentionally hiding himself. He isn’t surprised at all, but there’s still disappointment welling up in his stomach. 

“And after?” Near asks.

Mello’s fingers tap against the sheets. They’re much more calloused than Near remembers. It’s been a long time since they’d been in the same room, and this is the first time Near has gotten a good look at Mello since then.

“After?” Mello shrugs. “I don’t know. Right now, we should focus on the case.” 

“You’re avoiding it,” Near says, laying out his arm so Mello could see his writing on Near’s wrist. “We need to talk about this.” Mello doesn’t hesitate to look down at it, which surprises Near. 

He’s even more shocked when Mello’s fingers enclose his wrist and his thumb runs over the writing gently. 

“I made a mistake leaving,” Mello says slowly. His eyes flicker up to meet Near’s. “We _will_ talk about... _this_ when it’s all over. I promise.” 

Mello releases his wrist and stands up. He doesn’t say goodbye, but he does stop and look back at Near before he swings out of the window and out of sight again.

Near doesn’t sleep well that night. 

They pass information through Halle. She’s beginning to suspect again, but she doesn’t ask Near about it. He’s sure she’s asked Mello and he hopes that Mello at least had the decency not to share their secret. 

Near tries his best to keep Mello off his mind. He has a case to focus on and Mello had promised that they’d talk.

Not that Near was holding out hope for that. 

Still, it was a bit hard to forget when Linda contacts him constantly about… well, she asks about Mello, but Near knows it’s all a veiled attempt to figure out how Matt is. 

“How is Mello doing?” 

“Well enough to send me information from time to time,” Near says back to her. “I don’t know how Matt is.” 

“I didn’t ask about Matt,” she responds irritably. 

“I know you’re worried about him.” 

“I’m angry at him.” 

“You can be worried and angry,” Near points out. “It’s okay if you worry about him.” 

Matt had left Wammy’s to assist Mello, much to Linda’s anger. _At least he said goodbye to her,_ Near thinks bitterly, _at least she knows he’ll come back for her when this is over._

Near would never say that to Linda though. She has every right to be upset with Matt. She’s safe at Wammy’s, yes, but he’s left her alone there. Near almost wants to bring her here to spite Matt and Mello, but he’s not petty enough to risk her life like that. 

“...Do you think they’re going to be okay?” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Near reassures. “I’m certain they’ll be fine.” 

“Have you talked to Mello about-“ 

“After the case,” Near interrupts. 

She tries to talk to him about Mello because she knows well how hurt Near is. Matt had told her about them being soulmates back at Wammy’s, after Mello had told him. Near knows that she cares about him and just wants to help, but every time he hears Mello’s name, his chest aches with some sort of pain Near wishes would go away.

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“No.” 

“Just making sure,” Linda laughs dryly through the phone. 

“I have to go back to work,” Near says when he sees Rester motion to him. Gevanni is waiting on the screen to report. 

“Of course, I’ll talk to you later.” Linda pauses for a second. “Call more often. I miss you.”

She hangs up, missing Near’s “I miss you too” that he whispers. He puts the phone down and goes to talk to his employees. 

He realizes that he feels incredibly lonely. 

There’s nothing he can do about it. The previous L worked alone, set up this system to be alone. It is safe, foolproof. L himself died because he let someone close to him.

Of course, Near knows that Mello, Linda, nor Matt would kill him intentionally like Kira had with L. But the principle remained that he would be safer alone. Away from anyone on the outside. 

Halle reports that Mello is unhappy about his plan to confront Kira at the Yellow Box Warehouse, but she says nothing else. Near made it clear that Mello and Matt should not attend. He’s not sure what he would do, if they died. 

Especially knowing that Linda was waiting for Matt. It would shatter her heart. 

And Near’s too, if Mello were to die. 

So, when he sees why the two of them have gone quiet, he breaks the head off of one of his action figures. He orders Linder and Rester to follow, but can only sit and watch as they impulsively act out their plans. 

Matt is only lucky that Near had sent out his team to rescue him, because he’d have gotten shot otherwise. Near hadn’t bothered to hide this all from Linda, so when he arrives back at the headquarters, Near can hear her shrieking at him through the phone in the other room. 

He keeps his eyes peeled for anything on Mello. He’d have lectured Matt himself, but Linda sounds like she has that covered. Even Rester winces at her enraged voice. 

He breathes when he receives a call listed under _Anonymous _.__

__“Mello,” Near greets, trying to keep his voice even._ _

__“Can you send a car out? The truck I stole was set on fire.” Mello’s voice was casual, though Near could hear the loud crackling of fire outside._ _

__“Lidner should be in the area.”_ _

__“I see her.”_ _

__“We’ll talk when you get back,” Near grits out. He sets down the phone and puts his decapitated action figure down for the first time since this debacle started._ _

__As Near waits for Mello to come back, Matt eventually comes out of the other room and sits in one of the computer chairs._ _

__“We didn’t mean to make you worry,” Matt grumbles._ _

__“You didn’t mean to?” Near turns to him, wanting to throw his broken action figure right at Matt’s face. “Then why didn’t you warn us beforehand? Or at least try to contact us while you were doing it? There were a million things you could’ve done to make us worry less and neither of you did a single one.”_ _

__Mello walks in during his little tirade and looks like he wants to walk back out. Near turns to him and glares, daring him to argue. He knows damn well he’s right on this._ _

__“Okay, so we fucked up, but you have to admit, we did help,” Mello says, holding his hands up in mock surrender._ _

__“That’s not the point,” Near says coldly. “You both could’ve died. And what are Linda and I supposed to do if you’re-”_ _

__He realizes that Rester and Lidner are still listening. They don’t need to know any of this, that Mello is his soulmate._ _

__“I have work to do.” Near turns back to his screen. “Unless you have information, you may leave.” He heard Matt get up and start to walk away, but stop. Mello stepped closer to him._ _

__“Call me when we win,” Mello says quietly, right in his ear. “I’m keeping my promise.”_ _

__Near hears Mello leave and nearly calls out for him to come back._ _

__But he waits until after the meeting at the warehouse. It goes as well as he expected. Near watches, relatively calm, as Light Yagami loses it, yelling and laughing. He wants to wonder how L could’ve lost to this…_ _

__However, the score between L and Kira is settled. Even though he’s not particularly superstitious, Near does hope his mentor can rest easy at least, now that his murderer is dead himself._ _

__The mood is uncertain when they arrive back at the headquarters. Near tells his employees to go out and celebrate, though they don’t seem all too excited. Near just wants to be alone for this. He snags a phone from one of the desks._ _

__The phone only rings once._ _

__“Saw that Yagami died,” Mello says._ _

__“You promised” is all Near can get out. He’s felt on edge since Mello had reminded him about it and all he wants is to finally figure this out. He doesn’t want to be alone any longer._ _

__“I’m already on my way. Give me five minutes, okay?”_ _

__“Alright.”_ _

__Near just hopes that Mello will actually stay this time._ _

**Author's Note:**

> I really tried my best on this but I can’t tell how I did on this. Normally I’m either proud or disappointed with how a fic came out but I just felt numb about this one. I had a hard time getting it done (and I apologize to those still waiting for requests to come out, I just found out I have three whole ass exams this week so it’ll be a bit 😞) 
> 
> anyway, thanks for reading! I appreciate any kudos and comments you leave <3


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